Happiness
is much more strongly linked to culture than to money. Anyone in any
culture who has trouble with the necessities of life, food, shelter, and
clothing, is not likely to be happy. In general, wealthy people tend to
be less stressed than those with less money because they don’t worry
about the necessities.
Nevertheless, money brings its own stressors.
Today,
a number of psychiatrists specialize in helping people who have
suddenly come into money. It could be winning the lottery, receiving an
inheritance, or suddenly becoming a successful music or movie star or
professional athlete. Coming into a lot of money can be very stressful
and dislocating, which is why you find so many young wealthy stars
having problems with alcohol, drugs, and just coping.
What’s
interesting about the people who tend to be happy is that they are the
ones who have a culture of familial and group support. We might look at
some of these people and think of them as poor. But if they have the
necessities of life, even if they have to work hard for them, they may
be quite happy.
In
some South American countries, children are constantly being held for
the first year of their life. They are surrounded by family and friends,
and experience being loved from birth onward. They grow up feeling
secure and safe. As long as there is food to eat, shelter, and clothing,
they don’t really know that they’re poor and don’t experience any
negativity because of that.
Some
of the wealthy people in the world are under a great deal of stress
because they worry about losing what they have or not being able to get
more. I remember when Kenneth Lay was first accused of wrongdoing in the
Enron debacle. His wife went on television, teary-eyed, and said that
they might lose their house. One could almost feel sorry for the poor
woman if you didn’t know that they had three houses. What’s scary about
that is that she might have been sincerely distressed.
It
is said that some of the people who jumped out of the window after the
market crash of the great depression were still many times wealthier
than the average American. They just couldn’t imagine living below their
current economic level.
Happiness
is never going to be determined by money, although money can help to
keep us from the stress of not having the necessities of life. If we
have the necessities of life, then happiness will be found in the love
and support of those around us, our immediate family and our community.
In these kinds of cultures and communities, no one will ever go without
if they become sick or can’t work. Everyone’s needs will be seen too.
In
that kind of setting, you don’t even know that money and material
possessions are supposed to make you happy. And those who have money and
material possessions but do not have a loving and supportive family,
friends, and community, will never find happiness in their money and
possessions.
So
the bedrock of happiness is the loving support of family, friends, and
community. Money and material possessions are fine if you have that
support but will never replace it.
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